Brutal breakups, we’ve all been there.
As a relationship draws to a close and it’s time for you to accept the fact that you have to move on with your life, you suddenly come to discover that it isn’t as easy as you hope it would be. At first, you have to try your best to find closure. You want to pinpoint just what went wrong in the relationship so you can be sure that there’s nothing you can do to fix things anymore; and also so that you can make sure to not make the same mistakes in future chances at love. You want all of the answers concerning the questions that plagued your flawed relationship since the beginning. You need to find these answers because you think that that is the only way you can close this chapter of your life.
A lot of people are going to deal with these breakups in different manners. Some people are going to rely on the emotional support from friends and family. Others are going to depend on the professional help of licensed therapists and experts. Some will try to be resourceful and turn to the internet for answers. It all depends on how you typically approach problem solving as an individual. And there isn’t a proper blueprint that people have to follow to its absolute ends.
But if you want the advice of an expert, then you should probably read this article in its entirety. Here are a relationship expert’s top 8 tips to helping you get over a tough breakup:
1. Understand that the grieving process is a necessary one you have to undertake.
It would be totally unhealthy for you to try to ignore your true feelings and emotions. You have to be brave enough to confront what you feel inside. You have to have the courage to actually face the truth and come to terms with the fact that you feel terrible.
2. Find yourself a reliable support group.
Your friends and family are there for you for a reason. You have to be able to rely on them to be there for you. They have to give you a shoulder to cry on whenever you’re going through a rough patch. You need to be able to count on them to carry you over the hill when your legs are also wobbly.
3. Completely cut all ties with your ex.
One of the most effective ways to move on from someone is to completely detach yourself from that individual. And in order for you to detach yourself from your ex, you have to try your best to cut ties with one another. You can’t detach from your ex if you’re still making them a big part of your life.
4. Reflect on your mistakes and learn from them.
To gain closure, you need soundness of mind. You need to be able to assess the wrong and toxic aspects of your relationship and you need to be able to correct them. You need to be able to learn from them. You need to grow from them. And once you recognize your mistakes, moving on becomes easier to do.
5. Treat yourself as a priority moving forward.
Be kind to yourself. You need to prioritize yourself moving forward. You have to recognize that you are the one who is in need of healing. Now that you’re back to being single, take this time to focus on the life that you want for yourself.
6. Don’t think it’s bad to look back every once in a while.
Just because the relationship ended doesn’t mean that you pretend that it never existed. It’s okay to acknowledge your own history. In fact, it’s better if you do. Portion of moving on is remembering that what happened in your past should stay in the past.
7. Don’t pressure yourself into moving on so quickly.
Moving on takes time. It’s not something that you can rush or fast-forward. It’s not something that you can just choose to skip. It’s a process that is both meticulous and methodical in nature. You have to allow yourself the necessary time to be sad before you can move on to a place of happiness again.
8. Don’t be afraid of jumping back into the water when you’re ready.
Once you feel like you’re okay. Don’t be afraid to fall back in love. Sometimes, the best gauge to tell whether a person has moved on or not is when that individual has taken the leap once more. If you’re ready to love again, then do so. Don’t let the fear of heartbreak keep you from finding love again.
9. Hold in mind that this isn’t a battle that you’re fighting on your own.
And no matter how difficult things might seem in this uphill battle of yours, know that you aren’t alone. Plenty of people have salsod where you are now and they made it out alive. You can do the same.
Talk to me
How did you move on from your breakup? Talk to me in the comments below!
The more you understand yourself, the more silence there is, the healthier you are. —Maxime Lagacé